Leaders: Pride or Humility?

Proverbs 11:2 says, “When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.”  With pride, we are self centered and believe we have a strength, skill, talent or accomplishment that we have achieved.  When we are self centered like this, we can no longer learn because we are so focused on how good we already are.  Pride is destructive, there is no doubt about it.

When we are humble, we know it is not because of anything that we have done and we are fully and completely reliant on God for strength, skill, talent and provision or accomplishment – anything good.  That is when we have an openness to gain wisdom – only when we take the focus off self and put the focus rightfully on God and how He plans to use the skills He has provided us.

As I look at the proverb quoted above, I find that there is a definitive action that happens depending on the attitude that I have.  If I have an attitude of pride, then disgrace will come.  Notice the proverb is emphatic – it does not say that disgrace might come, or the odds are better than even it will come, or that it will come on alternating Tuesday’s – it just about guarantees that disgrace will come.  It makes me pause and ask the question, is having pride worth the disgrace that will come?  Is pumping myself up so I feel better or that others will look highly upon me worth it when I know that at some point, I will encounter disgrace?

If I have an attitude of humility, then wisdom will come.  We know from other proverbs that wisdom is more profitable than silver and yields better returns than gold (2:14); wisdom is supreme (4:7).  We also know that fools despise wisdom. Therefore, if we want to have wisdom, one sure way to get it is to have an attitude of humility.  Having an attitude of humility is not about being weak or powerless or any of the other negative connotations that are typically associated with being humble.  Rather, a attitude of humility is displayed when we truly believe that we must still learn, be open to other ideas, that people all around us are more skilled than we are in certain areas, that we don’t have (or need to have) all the answers.

As a leader, do you desire wisdom?  Certainly, the answer is yes.  How do you acquire wisdom?  One way is to have an attitude of humility.  Another is to have an attitude of continued learning from those you can trust.  See the post Who Are You Listening To for more ideas on this.

What has been your experience?  How do you contrast pride and humility? Have you experienced a time when your attitude of humility has resulted in wisdom?  Have you experienced a time when your pride has led to disgrace?  Share with others so we can all learn.

True Words of Wisdom

I was struck recently about the real words of wisdom in Proverbs 2.  The whole chapter contains such great advice for anyone, especially leaders.  There is a call to action, the rewards for that action are clearly spoken of, and there are clear consequences for those who do not heed the call to action.  Let me give you a few snippets:

Call to action

Verses 1-4 tell us we are called to:

• Store up the commands that will follow within you

• Turn your ear to wisdom – we have to be willing to listen to wisdom, and not just secular wisdom (especially not secular wisdom) but godly wisdom

• Apply this wisdom to your heart so you will gain understanding

• We are to call out for insight – it just doesn’t come without our calling out for it

• We are to cry aloud for understanding – this is not an tearful cry but an impassioned pleading to gain understanding

• We are to treat it as silver (valuable) and search for it as hidden treasure

Simple, yet profound truths

• The Lord gives wisdom – real, truthful wisdom does not come from any other source, despite what we may want to believe

• The Lord holds victory in store for the upright and He is a shield to those whose walk is blameless

• He guards the course of the just and protects the way of his faithful ones.

• Wisdom will save you from the ways of wicked men – there are many wicked people out there, and the only way we will be saved from them is to really know wisdom that comes from one source and one source only.

Rewards for that action

• After following the call to action, then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God – how awesome is that!

• After following the call to action, then you will understand what is right and just and fair

• After following the call to action, wisdom will enter your heart and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul

• After following the call to action, discretion will protect you and understanding will guard you

Notice that in each of these, we must take an action first before the reward comes.  I know that is contrary to our “instant gratification” and “microwave solutions” world we live in today, but it is reality.

Consequences for those who do not heed the call to action

• For not following the call to action, you will wind up being influenced by wicked people who will take you to places you don’t want to go

• For not following the call to action, you will be taken by devious people who are out for themselves, despite what they tell you

• For not following the call to action, you will be considered wicked and you will be cut off from the land, or cut off from resources you need to just survive

• For not following the call to action, you will be considered unfaithful and will be torn from the land that provides resources needed for survival.

Where do you get your wisdom from? I talked about this in an earlier post on Who Are You Listening To? As we can see, it really does matter. We must be very diligent as to whom and where we go to for answers to our questions, for advice in our problems and for guidance to live life.  As the Lord is the only source of true and real wisdom, those who desire this wisdom (which is like a hidden treasure) need to spend a lot of time listening to Him.  Leaders, are you listening to Him or to the world?

What is it I really treasure?  That depends on my motivation, interests and attention.  If my motivation, interests and attention are on obtaining and understanding the wisdom that is available to me only from God, I will spend a great deal of time there.  If my motivation, interests and attention are to obtain the comforts of this life, of the riches of this life, then I will spend a lot of time in that secular world listening to what it has to offer and implementing the techniques it claims will bring happiness and contentment.

There is so much wisdom in this book of Proverbs.  What else are you finding in it?

Seeking Constructive Criticism

If you are a serious student of the book of Proverbs, you know there is a wealth of wise counsel and great advice found in these 31 chapters.  Four proverbs in particular talk about the wisdom people and leaders receive when they humble themselves to listen to the constructive criticism from others.

If you listen to constructive criticism, you will be at home among the wise – (15:31). To one who listens, valid criticism is like a gold earring or other gold jewelry – (25:12).  In the end, people appreciate honest criticism far more than flattery – (28:23).  These three proverbs have a common element of being able to seek, listen for and accept constructive criticism. Simply stated, people who are secure in themselves will welcome constructive criticism as a way to continue learning and growing, while insecure people will resist such valuable nuggets.  Insecure people may get defensive or offer any number of excuses rather than just listening to constructive criticism. We can learn a great deal from others, including the perception that others have of us as leaders.  We may disagree with these perceptions, or not be aware of them at all.  Yet, if these perceptions are what others view as facts regarding our behaviors, intentions, attitudes or motives, then we are wise to pay attention to them.

These three proverbs also speak of the value received in hearing constructive criticism.  In one case, you will be “at home among the wise” – that holds significant value.  In another verse, valid criticism is likened to jewelry that holds high value.  In the last proverb, honest criticism is valued higher than what we receive when others point out our good points through flattery.  So there is real value in listening for and accepting valid, honest and constructive criticism. Yes, it may be difficult or sometimes painful to listen to what others have to say to us.  Nevertheless, the value received far out weighs the difficulty or pain. How would you rate yourself in listening for and accepting criticism?  Do you value it as much as the writers of Proverbs have suggested?

Proverbs 29:1 says, “Whoever stubbornly refuses to accept criticism will suddenly be destroyed beyond recovery.” To be “destroyed beyond recovery” is a scary thought. This is what will happen to those who “stubbornly refuse to accept criticism.” According to Sam Chand, a former pastor and university president,”It’s hard to work with somebody who has the attitude that he or she is right and everybody else is wrong. So for me, if somebody doesn’t have the attitude of self-improvement or self-criticism, I can’t really work with that person.” Sam is really echoing the advice given in this proverb. In other words, if, because of their attitude someone refuses to listen to or acknowledge criticism because they feel they are always right, they will be destroyed – people will not want to work with them or for them and they will no longer be in a position to lead others.

Leaders must be secure enough to want to hear such valuable insight that constructive criticism can provide.  Using a 360 degree feedback tool or having a coach work with a leader is important for their growth.  Being secure indicates that the leader has a strong amount of self-confidence, without being arrogant about it.  This requires humility and a willingness to listen to others input of what you are doing and how you are behaving.

Warren Bennis has said that “The (organizational) cultures that are the most toxic are those where nobody knows the truth or is talking about it. Toxic cultures are those where there usually isn’t that degree of openness. And they can’t be transparent about everything but there are too many examples of companies failing where there’s been a lack of transparency.” Sounds to me like the leaders of those cultures do not promote the value of listening for and accepting constructive criticism.

What do you think?